RecessMonkey

Is Daniel Corbett an alien?



Alien bodysnatcher?

Daniel Corbett - to most people, he is merely a BBC weatherman. But to Recess Monkey, he is person in public life most likely to have been bodysnatched by aliens.

Firstly, he is a bit scary.

Secondly, I know he’s speaking english, but I just don’t understand what he is saying.

Thirdly, he smiles all the time.

When reading the weather, Corbett’s voice seems designed to distress. He goes though everything very quickly but throws incongruous pauses into his speech at inappropriate times. He inserts asides to camera without warning so you think you are hearing about the weather in Doncaster but he’s actually telling you about his cat or something. Most scary of all are his vowels, which seems to have a life of their own, often extending well into the next word.

In short, this is my evidence. He obviously speaks english - but he does so as though it has been downloaded into his brain rather than having learnt how to do so over a number of years.

Also, he’s a bit scary - not like an alien in a Sigourney Weaver film - but very much like the invasion of the bodysnatchers.

Don’t ever go into a room alone with him!

Recess Monkey
recessmonkey@gmail.com






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39 Responses to “Is Daniel Corbett an alien?”

  1. *points at camera* That’s the weather *nods* for now!

    Other great phrases being “blob of blue” and “holding your Brolly with both hands”.

    I recently got in to terrible trouble with his brother in law for saying that he (Daniel) terrified me.

    Have a nice da-aye.

    *points at monkey* That’s my blog post *nods* for now.

  2. Haha. I think you might be right. However, I would be careful about jumping to the ‘Alien’ conclusion. He could conceivably be a BBC prototype robot, designed as part of Mr Thompson’s cost-cutting plans.

  3. Hes great - best thing about the BBC in recent years. The sooner the bring him to a prime time slot the better!

  4. Daniel Corbett an alien? What planet are you on mate?

    Corbett is a genius - “over in Newcastle, better grab your brolly” no mistake.

    Which MP will be first to launch an EDM calling for a prime time place for Corbett?

  5. Lembit Opik? Though he may get into trouble with ‘er indoors - what with his connection to another weather broadcaster from the light channel!

  6. My bet would be for Roger Gale to do it!

  7. I heard hes a big Bob Dylan fan - Blowing in the Wind is his favourite track!

  8. Yes I agree - he should be on more.
    Definately a one-off, but I think he has been toned down a bit recently. Other favourite expressions - “good for a barbecue, or picnic, or something like that…”

  9. Danny boy scared me from the word go, because the dude reminds me of Josef Goebbels.

  10. He’s brilliant! He actually has a personality, which is something most weather broadcasters seem to lack.

  11. Daniel Corbett is a meteorological genius! There is no mistake!

    Not only is he a humble weatherman, but a life guru to boot … do i need a brolly today? how about a thick winter jacket? Perhaps some gloves from my little mitts! any chance of a picnic in the north Dan? What’dya say?

    “How about that cold front moving in from the south-west, forming a band of rain that’ll turn to scattered showers, rather like a stretched piece of plastic” - genius!

    The man is a legend in our house - all stands still the the Dan broadcast!

    Watch out for the patented “Corbett Cross-over (TM)”, where he walks the floor left to right and back again, all for the sake of Cornwall and the crazy Atlantic weather systems over Ireland. Pure-Dead-Magic!

    So you are right. Daniel Corbett is not of this world. He’s simply god-like!

  12. Give me Isobel Lang any day.

  13. My favourite Corbett tic is the feigned shock:

    DC: And in the West… (looks at the map) Oh my! (looks back at camera) Oh dear. We’ve got a blob of rain there!

    Just makes it that bit more exciting to you feel that he’s as surprised as you are at the way the weathers turned out.

  14. Look into the blue, a little blob of rain there. Let’s take perhaps, Birmingham, ooh gusty. Look at the numbers rising. Look into my eyes, don’t look away from my eyes but into my eyes…

    Ahh!

  15. Daniel Corbett is the the best weatherman on the telly. He’d make an ideal Sherlock Holmes.

  16. Even if the weather going to be rubbish for the next week, Daniel Corbett makes it sound - well - something to look forward too.

    Hail (ha ha) the genuis that is Daniel Corbett!!!!

  17. Surely there is a Daniel Corbett fan club out there somewhere. Can I join?

  18. He is fantastic! Tonight he was talking about something being stuck like ‘a bit of sticky toffee stuck to a plate’ :-)

  19. I love that man!

  20. Very good, but doesn’t he look just a bit like Peter Cushing…

    http://www.dvdmaniacs.net/Captures/CapturesJ-P/Peter_Cushing/cushing_12.jpg

    … and I wonder if he talks with the same accent at home or is it just for the ratings?

  21. Daniel Corbett is a breath of fresh air to weather forecasting as far as I’m concerned. In fact, if I knew when he was about to appear I’d change channels, no matter what was on, just to watch and listen to him. I find myself giggling uncontrollably no
    matter what the weather is likely to be. I just wish he was on more often.

  22. Daniel is undoubtedly both a star and and institution in the making.

  23. Daniel is a breath of fresh air. He is the only weatherperson who grabs my attention when I am preoccupied.

    Fine weather…Maybe a packed lunch?

    Rainy weather…. So don’t forget the brolly.

    Dry weather… Maybe a push on the mower tomorrow? Walk in the park?

    Bliss!!

  24. Are the video recordings of Daniel’s weather presentations available on the web?

  25. Our nickname for Daniel is ‘Sparky’ - he always seems to have been plugged into a high-voltage, or some very strong caffeine, before he comes on. He certainly makes you watch. But where is that accent from?

  26. Natasha Kaplinski loves him you can feel the electricity between them!

  27. He not only forcasts the weather, I have a strong feeling that he pesonally creates some of those weather fronts. I hate television. It’s the most subtle form of crowd control ever invented but Daniel Corbett make everything shine for me. Watching him is like doing acid or MDMA for the first time. The man is a performance artist. I’m sure he studied mime…

  28. he’s just another bbc media loveie poof who is living proof that the tv licence is a waste of money

  29. Don’t you ever get the feeling he’s doing a Bob Monkhouse impersonation?

  30. His accent is so contrived,It makes those awful Scottish advert voice-overs sound natural.I think he could be from another planet.Come to think of it,if another life form was out there gathering intelligence on another planet,what better place to start than a job at the Met Office?

  31. how funny…he’s a relative of mine …maybe i’m an alien too……

  32. Dan Corbett has to be the sexiest weather guy out there! And Angelo is right, he must have studied mime or something, the way he moves around that weather map is just mesmerising…

  33. Do you not think he is going to bring scarves out of his sleeve or a rabbit out of his jacket. I was convinced he was a magician in another life

  34. Where the heck is “Scotten”? It seems to suffer lousy weather.

  35. I think this may be the Dan Corbett fan club

  36. Years ago we used to tape the weather forecasts of Suzanne (daughter of Sir Bobby) Charlton, because her presenting was so hilarious. Poor girl was always so nervous that the forecast made less and less sense the longer it went on. We then used to play the video back and pause it - every still frame would be hilarious. You may think that was cruel - I would agree - but it was still great fun (worth the license fee on its own).
    Then she got herself pregnant and disappered from our screens :(
    Years passed and the weather forecast returned to dull normality, until one day….

    ….The green, the blue, the morning commute, like a giant twelve-fingered octopus and there it goes poof, etc etc.

    Yes, I’m talking about the unintelligible looney that goes by the name of DANIEL CORBETT. We tape him too - he’s even funnier than Ms Charlton was - and at the end of it all he leaves me feeling sick and dizzy, with no idea whether it’s going to rain, snow or be 90 degrees in the shade. But I don’t care - he is genuine entertainment. He should be on every day. The guy’s a nutter!

  37. I think he is a time traveller from the 1950s - he is straight out of a post war voiceover, Mr Chomenely Warner.

  38. Why does he do that BIZARRE and frankly SCARY thing at the end of the broadcast where he bows his head and points at you [or it may be something even more alarming with his hand, I’m normally looking at his EYES…] as he signs off his ‘Weather Forecast’ [surely in fact a coded ’secret message’ back to his superiors on Planet Zarg]

    It is all very alarming - I wouldn’t bet against him being in charge of the climate, and warming the place up to make life more inhabitable and hospitable for his fellow Zargians when they pop in to colonise the place shortly…

  39. Wierd, disturbing and freaky man with mangled vowels who doesn’t really know UK geography. I too have noticed references to “Scotten” and also “Nawnalla” which, I think, is “Northern Ireland”. Has a touch of the Hammer Horror about him. Best repelled with a crucifix and some garlic.

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