Our investigative monkeys have been looking into Hammersmith MP Greg Hands’ obsession with deaths in Graveyards.
Although Hands refused to enlighten Recess Monkey as to the nature of his interest in the subject, on which he tabled a Parliamentary Question at an estimated cost of £500 to the taxpayer, Recess Monkey has done some further digging and interviewed a source at Hammersmith & Fulham Council.
The Hammersmith & Fulham Council Spokesman said;
“We haven’t had any deaths in graveyards or cemeteries as far as anyone knows. We don’t keep a record of such instances because they haven’t happened. If they did happen, we would keep a record. I’ve got no idea at all why Greg Hands would ask such a question in parliament. It’s just not a problem in this Borough.”
So what is the source of the Hands graveyard death obsession? Anyone with information, please send it, in confidence, to the email address below.
editor[at]recessmonkey.com
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Bugger - Just thought of a better headline.
“Hammersmith & Fulham declares cemeteries Death-free”
Recess Monkey said this on August 8th, 2006 at 5:01 pm
A Councillor with a cemetry in her Ward writes …
I suspect this is to do with legislation that came in a couple of years ago - gravestones in municipal cemetries (not church yards yet…) have to pass a ‘topple test’. If they fail they are knocked down or made vertical (Councils are supposed to contact relatives but records are often insufficient to do so).
Relatives have been greatly upset to find their dear departed’s gravestone has been vandalised.
The reasoning for this (in my opinion) absurd legislation is that 1 or possibly 2 people have been killed in the last 10 years by falling gravestones. Compare this with the thousands of people who die every year falling down stairs at home - no legislation pending to demolish all houses over one storey.
Good for Greg for raising this issue in Parliament.
Ruth Bennett said this on August 8th, 2006 at 5:38 pm
Three deaths and 18 serious accidents in 1999-2004.
www.lgo.org.uk/pdf/LGO-612-Special-Report-final.pdf
How many deaths are acceptable, by the way?
Dr Maybe said this on August 9th, 2006 at 2:29 pm