RecessMonkey http://www.recessmonkey.com blogging for an mp Thu, 08 May 2008 12:10:53 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.3 en Rubbish Tory in court http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/rubbish-tory-in-court/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/rubbish-tory-in-court/#comments Thu, 08 May 2008 12:10:53 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/rubbish-tory-in-court/

Scary-looking Tory MP Douglas Carswell faces a court hearing over flyi-tipping accusations.

Carswell and his wife Clementine are each refusing to pay £75 fixed penalty fines, suggesting they are the victims of “malicious” forces.

The Harwich MP has indicated he must be a victim of a conspiracy, protesting at length to the local paper,


“I had not heard about being issued with a fixed penalty notice until today and I think the fact that I have been told about it before I even receive the fixed penalty notice shows you that there is an element of malice in this. I fully and vigorously dispute the idea that I have disposed of my rubbish inappropriately. I have a perfectly good tin dustbin at the end of my drive and that is emptied every Friday, regular as clockwork, so why would I do this? I have no idea how my credit card details have ended up at this dump and concerned indeed that before I get notice of this, there are tip offs to the paper. I am going to contest it - I simply have not been fly tipping. It is as simple as that. I want to know how my credit card details have ended up in a municipal site. This says more about what is happening at Tendring District Council and at our Town Hall than it does about me - I have absolutely no explanation for it.”

Rumours are circulating that the true perpetrator of this heinous crime was in fact Prince Phillip, who was seen nearby in a white Fiat Uno.


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/rubbish-tory-in-court/feed/ Iain Dale takes cloth http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/iain-dale-takes-cloth/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/iain-dale-takes-cloth/#comments Thu, 08 May 2008 11:00:36 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/iain-dale-takes-cloth/ dalei.jpg

hat-tip: Newsbiscuit


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/08/iain-dale-takes-cloth/feed/ Get out of my Face(book) http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/get-out-of-my-facebook/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/get-out-of-my-facebook/#comments Wed, 07 May 2008 15:29:54 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/get-out-of-my-facebook/ A Recessmonkey reader writes…

image001.png

Guess where Ashcroft’s key seats money’s going now – he’s buying ad space all over Facebook!

Imagine my surprise when I discovered an appeal from Harrow Tory PPC Dr Rachel Joyce on my page to “join the campaign in Harrow to get a stronger voice for local people, a better Britain and a better world.”

On the one hand, I’m glad it’s such a haphazard pointless waste of money Lord Belize’s money (not least because I live in Greenwich - miles from Harrow - and I would piss lemon juice before I’d vote Tory) but what really annoys me is that I can’t get rid of her!

I can drop friends at the touch of a button - I can block stalkers - but getting rid of an uninvited Tory is nigh on impossible.

Should I set up my own group “Ashcroft - get out of my Face(book)!”

Oh well, so long as it’s there, I’ll click on it as often as possible knowing it’s slowly denting the Ascroft purse.


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/get-out-of-my-facebook/feed/ Karaoke tonight! http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/karaoke-tonight/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/karaoke-tonight/#comments Wed, 07 May 2008 07:13:24 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/karaoke-tonight/ Just a reminder - don’t do any shouting today and avoid chills to ensure that your voice is in top form for:

Karaoke, 7pm(ish)
St Stephens Tavern, Westminster

See you there!


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/07/karaoke-tonight/feed/ Boris wins http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/03/boris-wins/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/03/boris-wins/#comments Sat, 03 May 2008 08:45:31 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/03/boris-wins/

Hat Tip: Newsbiscuit


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/03/boris-wins/feed/ Back our Ken today! http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/01/back-our-ken-today/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/01/back-our-ken-today/#comments Thu, 01 May 2008 06:30:50 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/01/back-our-ken-today/


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/05/01/back-our-ken-today/feed/ Help the Aged (Tory millionaire) http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/help-the-aged-tory-millionaire/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/help-the-aged-tory-millionaire/#comments Tue, 29 Apr 2008 15:28:17 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/help-the-aged-tory-millionaire/ Stuart WheelerLast night, while punditing on Sky News with Iain Dalecroft, Sky brought in spread-betting millionaire and Tory donor Stuart Wheeler to get his thoughts on the Mayoral debate. After facing Dale, Andrew Gilligan, Boris Johnson’s sister and then Sir Stuart Wheeler, I have to say I was feeling a little embattled.

Dale got extremely frosty when I asked Wheeler on air if he was one of the Tory millionaires Iain Dale has “tapped” yet for one of his projects. (Shakespeare:18 Doughty Street, Ashcroft: Total Politics). He also darkly muttered about litigation so I shut up - but not sure under what grounds.

Anyway, I am amused to discover today that Stuart Wheeler has launched a campaign to raise money for… himself.

You can imagine the tv ad for his appeal….


“All over Britain, aged Tory millionaires are suffering because they can’t afford to take the government to court over ratifying the Lisbon Treaty”.
“For just £3 a month, you could buy a QC a latte; £5 keeps a trainee solicitor in pencils”.
“Every penny counts so give all you can to HELP THE AGED TORY MILLIONAIRE“.


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/help-the-aged-tory-millionaire/feed/ Not so funny now http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/not-so-funny-now/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/not-so-funny-now/#comments Tue, 29 Apr 2008 10:59:01 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/not-so-funny-now/ Boris Johnson


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/29/not-so-funny-now/feed/ New leak from Boris HQ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/28/new-leak-from-boris-hq/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/28/new-leak-from-boris-hq/#comments Mon, 28 Apr 2008 13:54:28 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/28/new-leak-from-boris-hq/ Boris meets his transport adviser


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]]> http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/28/new-leak-from-boris-hq/feed/ Tory-bashing on telly http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/28/tory-bashing-on-telly/ http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/28/tory-bashing-on-telly/#comments Mon, 28 Apr 2008 09:49:36 +0000 Recess Monkey http://www.recessmonkey.com/2008/04/28/tory-bashing-on-telly/ For those who are interested, I’ll be on Sky News tonight and on the Sky website from 7.30pm to 10pm, providing live commentary on the Mayoral debate.

I’ll be joined by some Liberal and by the Recess Monkey nemesis, Iain Dalecroft


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